Yep, Another Zombie Movie.

I know a film is exceptionally bad when I honestly believe that I could have written something better myself....
And I don't mean that in some kind of "That's not a knife; THIS is a knife...I'm smarter than everyone else" way, either. I'm not usually one to claim that I could have done better than someone else. In fact, I'm one of the most self-depreciating people you'll ever encounter.

I DO, however, have at least enough self esteem to know that I could have made a better zombie comedy than Night of the Living Dorks. What a lousy waste.

"Night of the Living Dorks" (2004)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0378417/


"Philip, Konrad, and Weener -- the three biggest dorks at Frederich Nietzsche High School -- get a second stab at coolness when they're killed in an auto accident and reanimated as flesh-eating zombies. Thanks to their rapidly decomposing bodies, there's no need for eating or sleeping, which leaves plenty of time for partying, girl-chasing -- and getting even with their enemies."


Seriously -- the best thing about this movie is its title. The rest is a low grade attempt at a wild teen stoner comedy with jokes that could have easily been written by an actual teen stoner. I WANTED to like this one because it has a good concept: three high school losers become zombies and get revenge on those who have tormented them. Sounds like something that would be right up my alley. Lots of opportunity in something like this for hilarity and gorey zombie fun. The actual result, though, is more like one of those direct-to-DVD American Pie sequels. There's no wit or originality in the jokes whatsoever; the main character's lust for the not-so-attractive popular girl instead of the obviously-beautiful nerdy neighbor is too ridiculous to condone; and the zombie action is so watered down it makes Shaun of the Dead seem like Cannibal Holocaust. Oh, and as open-minded as I usually am about foreign movies, the fact that this film is actually German (original title: Die Nacht der lebenden Loser), with horrible overdubbing, makes it all the harder to watch. I cannot recommend Night of the Living Dorks...not even to zombie fans.

1 out of 5.


b.