Calling All Idiots

I want to start my own charity....
It will be called the Save-A-Dave Foundation. See, in my years, I've known several guys named Dave, and frankly, a lot of them needed help. Whether it be with their finances, their family lives, or just simple day-to-day chores, these Daves could have benefited from some extra assistance. For example, I once had a boss named Dave (every place of employment has a mid-level manager named Dave). He was a great guy, but always seemed a little sad. Why? Because his kids hated him. Poor Dave had to spend so much time running the Shoney's where we worked that he had little time to devote to the children at home, and as a result, the guy constantly looked stressed out and broken. He'd let little nuggets about his private life slip out as a cry for help. Phrases like, "I had to miss my son's Little League game again," or "My wife is upset with me because I don't have time for snuggling" told me that old Dave could have used a helping hand. If only there had been an organization willing to step in and take over a few of Dave's responsibilities so he could devote more time to the fam....

(Dave Letterman is not affiliated with the Save-A-Dave Foundation)

But the Shoney's Dave wasn't the worst case I've encountered. I remember poor Dave D_ (I'll let him keep his anonymity) . I worked with him at a newspaper a few years back, and his life fell apart before my very eyes. Oh, Dave D_ -- your wife openly cheated on you; you went bankrupt; your kids were whisked away by Mommy's new boyfriend; you got fired, crashed your truck, and went to jail. WHY could no one HELP YOU???

Well, the Save-A-Dave Foundation would. See, under my charity, a person could donate money that would be used for helping out a qualifying Dave. Guys named Dave would apply for assistance, and their cases would be reviewed by a panel of caring experts. Depending on each applicant's circumstances, various levels of help would be provided. Say, in the case of the Shoney's Dave, Save-A-Dave might pay for a family counselor and a week's getaway for the whole clan at a Caribbean resort. Or maybe we'd just buy Dave and his wife a romantic dinner for two at some fancy restaurant in a posh neighborhood. In the case of Newspaper Dave, well...there's a whole lot Save-A-Dave could do, really. Legal and marriage counseling...free auto repairs...employment and direct financial assistance -- all of these services could be in the cards.


Now, keep in mind that the Save-A-Dave Foundation wouldn't just help any old dude named Dave. In fact, many Daves out there are doing just fine for themselves, and would not qualify for our program. I've known plenty of upstanding Daves who would not be eligible for hand-outs, and frankly should be ashamed for even applying. Oh, and it's not as though "Dave" is a name particularly prone to attracting hardship, either. I suppose that guys with other names, besides Dave, are just as likely to have problems in their lives (I've known many Erics, for example, who could have used help). I just thought that my charitable efforts had to start SOMEWHERE, and...well...Dave is as good a place as any. Besides, "Save-A-Dave" has more of a ring to it than, say, "Assist-A-Steve."

Keep your eyes peeled as I get the Save-A-Dave Foundation off the ground...so that we may get an actual Dave off the ground. Save your dimes, nickles, and pennies, folks -- somewhere, there's a Dave who needs your support.


Now, here's an appropriate movie to go with today's entry.

Stupidity (2003)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0399704/



Netflix description:
In this cheeky documentary, filmmaker Albert Nerenberg conducts an inquiry into the origins of stupidity, exploring why humans increasingly choose to be ignorant despite information being more widely available than ever. Footage includes interviews with authors, academicians and pop-culture personalities such as Noam Chomsky, Coolio, John Cleese, Salma Hayek and Bill Maher. Extras offer you a chance to test your IQ (Ignorance Quotient).

So, Stupidity is a documentary on...well...stupidity. Early on, we're asked, "What exactly IS stupidity? How can we clearly define it? Is the problem getting worse? Who or what is to blame?"

These are interesting questions. The documentary is strong out of the gate as it throws such issues at us. It then delves into the classical evolution of the whole concept of stupidity. It explores the development of the IQ test, and the origins of such terms as "idiot", "moron", and "imbecile". Why, the films asks, do we as a culture seem to insist on both being stupid, AND rewarding stupidity, when technology has made it possible for even the poorest elements of society to find enlightenment? This is intriguing stuff. SURELY there's a lot of ground to cover in a movie with a topic like this, right?

Well, sadly, Stupidity falls a bit short. While the first 30 minutes are truly fascinating, things go downhill pretty fast. We spend the second act observing some somewhat scary examples of modern stupidity -- like a lengthy study of a near-riot caused by Jackass veteran Steve-O in Toronto -- but the film dwells on these scenes for far too long. I was thinking, "Yeah, I get it. College guys are drunken ruffians. Let's move on now!" I got the feeling that the filmmakers were trying to stretch things, as though they had run out of the funds necessary to REALLY get into the subject as much as they'd like, and had to kill some time. An examination of the growing redneck culture that openly distrusts anything associated with the educational system had great potential, but the movie walked away from it having only scratched the surface. That, I thought, was where the film should have really shined.

(Is the news media to blame for our stupidity?)

Instead, Stupidity closes by launching an attack on President George W Bush (who was in office at the time of the film's production). Now, say what you will about George W, but I thought that turning this interesting movie into a political statement of such a pointed nature was a major misstep. If this country's epidemic of willful ignorance is going to be beat, we must get a large segment of the population on board. Stupidity starts to make its point, but then alienates half of its potential audience by turning the central issue into another annoying Liberals vs. Conservatives battle. Yo, filmmakers -- if you want the country to wise up as a whole, you'll NEED some of those conservatives (the Ayn Rand kind, not the Sarah Palin kind) to help reform its culture. Why would you blow your movie on bashing one political figure?

That's kind of stupid.

3 out of 5.

b.