Go Get Em, Balloon Boy!

I just want to say that I love Balloon Boy....
You know -- the kid with the runaway helium balloon. I, and millions of others, stayed glued to the television for most of Thursday afternoon, watching a giant package of Jiffy Pop float across the sky. See, it was thought that this six-year old, Falcon Heene, was trapped inside.

When this story first broke, I remember thinking, "The kid's probably not even in there." I figured he must have somehow let his dad's weather balloon loose, and then hid someplace to avoid getting in trouble. That's exactly the kind of thing I would have done at his age. "No worries," I said, while intensely following that balloon's trajectory across the skies of Colorado, "Everything will be fine."This was MY kind of national story -- everyone going nuts about a problem with no solution, while speculation ran rampant. Hilarious!

Well, when the stupid balloon finally landed, the child, of course, was not inside. Not long after, he was found hiding out in his folks' garage. At this point, I knew that the media Einsteins would turn to the finger-pointing. "Uh-Oh, this kid's parents are going to be crucified!" I thought. Sure enough, that's the story today. WAS IT A HOAX???, asks ABC News....BALLOON BOY SAFE, BUT QUESTIONS SWIRL, says my favorite network, BSNBC....

See, Balloon Boy apparently blurted something out about "doing it for TV" during an interview with CNN, so now the news hounds are speculating that the whole ordeal was a publicity stunt. First of all, you shouldn't read so deeply into anything a six year-old says. Secondly, it's entirely believable that a kid like that would get involved in such shenanigans. As I mentioned above, this is the sort of thing I personally would have done as a six year-old. My Mom has told me countless stories of the trouble I caused as a very young one, and I could totally see myself letting loose someone's experimental helium balloon, and then trying to hide out while it all blew over. Seems entirely logical to a six year-old. Heck, my fiance said to me yesterday, "You know, if WE ever have a kid, this is the kind of crap he's going to end up pulling all of the time", and I suspect that she's right (unless, of course, we have a girl -- girls are always boring). I accept that!

I hope this family gets its own show when the smoke all clears. Our nation needs a constant stream of entertainment, and these Heene folk have demonstrated an ability to provide it. They ought to have more kids, and be the replacements for Jon and Kate. Those TLC cold fish and their eight offspring were too boring for TV, anyway.

b.